Life With Chronic Pain: Finding Your Courage From The Ones You Love

16972215 - happy family with foster children in the forestLiving with chronic pain isn’t easy. There are some things you can’t do alone when you live with chronic pain. There will be days when you have to rely on the strength of the people you love. While it’s not always easy to ask for help, it can be relieving to draw on the strength of the people around you.

Chronic pain can be scary. It’s something that can easily take away the things you love in your life. It can draw you away from your friends and family and leave you feeling completely alone. It can be incredibly disheartening and intimidating to be diagnosed with this condition. But don’t worry, it’s okay. You’re not alone.

Using the strength of your loved ones to cope with chronic pain

Every member of your family has had some kind of trial they’ve had to go through. Talk to you them about their experiences with heartache and struggle. You may look to your 95-year-old grandpa who has lived alone for 25 years since his dear sweetheart passed away. Ask him how he does it. Listen as he tells you what he’s learned from his own trials. Learn from them. Some of the best lessons we can learn in this life will come from the older people we love, who have experienced more and have wisdom to give.

Admire your loved ones who see beauty in every day living

It’s often hard to see anything positive or beautiful about any autoimmune disease, but especially chronic pain. The best people to look toward when you need to see the beauty in the world are your children and family. Kids have this beautiful way of looking at every day life as something special and exciting. When your son or daughter comes home from school and is excited about getting 100% on their spelling test or being invited to a birthday party, draw from that. Kids can help us see the good and happiness in our lives. Learn to love the little triumphs in your day, just like your kids do.

Have honest conversations about your struggles with your loved ones

Most of your loved ones probably haven’t experienced chronic pain like you have. They won’t know exactly what you’re going through. However, they do have their own live experiences to share with you. Make sure you’re taking the time to discuss these struggles with your loved ones. For example, you can give your mom a call and talk to her about how she dealt her own struggles. Whether she has experienced divorce, the loss of someone she loves, or her own illnesses, lean on her and ask her to talk to you about her experiences. This is another great opportunity to learn from her and understand that trials are possible to defeat.

Let your loved ones help you with every day tasks

When you focus on the people you’re grateful for in your life, you have less time to focus on the hardships that come with chronic pain. It’s not always easy to ask someone you love for help and it’s usually even harder to accept charity from the people around you. When someone does something nice for you, take some time to reflect on how grateful you are for that service. Feel good knowing that there are people surrounding you who are ready to carry you when you can’t walk on your own. There’s a great deal of courage you can draw from understanding just how awesome that is.

You don’t have to go into any autoimmune disease with fear. You don’t have to feel completely alone or unable to keep going. The people in your life who love you and are there for you can help you when you can’t do it all on your own. You can find the courage you need to battle chronic pain through the people around you. Talk to them. Learn from them. It will do you a world of good.


About the Author
Katie Cleary is founder of  She lives with her autoimmune conditions and her family in Austin, Texas.

This post contains opinions of the author. is not a medical practice and does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment.  It is your responsibility to seek diagnosis, treatment, and advice from qualified providers based on your condition and particular circumstances.  Camino Real Ventures, Inc., the company that makes available to you, does not endorse nor recommend any products, practices, treatment methods, tests, physicians, service providers, procedures, clinical trials, opinions or information available on this website.  Your use of the website is subject to our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy



  1. Other than Rheumatology, what medical discipline(s) are most knowlegeable in treating autoimmune diseases/disorders?

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